We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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