i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
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