What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
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