Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
