Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
