god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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