i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
how does that bad decision feel?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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