Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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