I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
