we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
