I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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