woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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