i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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