People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I supernannyed him into submission
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
