Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
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