so explain again why im purple
no
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize