Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
