I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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