Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
