So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
