More tranny stories later!
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
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