I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
