In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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