wat bout pragnant strippers??
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
