I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
