forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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