One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Found the puke drawer
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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