My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
i black out too much to be "responsible"
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
