I want to make a zoo with you.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
