The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
false alarm. still invincible.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize