okay pat passed out under dana's car
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize