Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
