We won't sleep together?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
