I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
