have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
