guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Randomize
