is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
now i know why i became what i already was.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize
