Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Randomize