Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
