I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol â¤â¤ also dont tell anyone
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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