Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
