I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
