and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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