Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
