I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
