I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
