she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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