she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize