just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
