im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize