question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
