cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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